November 26th, 2001
A Final Sunday at the Office.
It was a nice day of work, as days of work go. The season faded out with a whimper, more or less. I strolled in after 11 am, knowing there wouldn't be any business until at least 12. I cooked up some hamburgers, drank some coffee and some Coke, and listened to some CDs. I washed bowls and mugs. I made my co-workers chicken sandwiches for the last time. I to breaks outside in the unusually warm post-Thanksgiving air. I went to the bathroom, in the bathroom. I ate french fries and chili. After the last customer left, Sharon and I sat and drank Black and Tans for an hour. We talked about buildings and businesses in Plymouth that had come and gone. We left at 6 pm, once Will came back to lock up. I took the last bit of the last batch of chili home with me.
One of the most important lessons to come out of my experience running the kitchen in the Southers Marsh clubhouse, beyond my learning how to better deal with stress, beyond my increased disappointment in golfers, beyond my new found ability to climb stairs quickly, beyond my appreciation for hot wings, beyond my improved tolerance for heat and cold, beyond my love of industrial grade appliances, beyond my sandwich assembly skills, my honed talents, and my waning fear of knives, beyond my fresh certainty that I do not want to work in the restaurant industry, and beyond my developing an addiction to Honey Mustard Dressing, has been the patient and careful perfection of my chili recipe. I have decided to share it here, so that it may benefit all mankind. I'm going to heat some up right now, actually, because I'm hungry for a snack. Ahh, that's better. Mmmm-mm. Actually, I didn't really heat any chili up. I just typed that so you'd think I did. I'm gonna cook some up, though. I mean, like real soon. It's pretty good, and I hope you enjoy it.
Ryan's Too-Tall Chili.
In your clean kitchen, gather:1 pound ground beef
1 medium-large onion, chopped
5 cloves garlic, coarsely chopped
1 green pepper, chopped
1/2 red pepper, chopped
1 29 oz can of whole peeled tomatoes
1 14 oz can of tomato puree
1 14 oz can of tomate paste
1 29 oz can of dark red kidney beans
Brown ground beef in a pan, draining off fat from time to time, without letting the meat become too dry. In a 5 quart or larger cooking pot, saute onion and garlic in 2 tbsp olive oil, over medium-low heat. After 2 minutes, add chopped pepper. Once onions are carmelized and peppers mostly cooked, add the browned beef. Stir. Add the entire can of peeled tomatoes, juice and all. Do your best to chop the soft tomatoes up within the pot, using kitchen shears or knives, if you have not already coarsely pureed them. Add the entire can of kidney beans. Then add most of the tomato paste can. Too much tomato paste will turn your chili into spaghetti sauce. Stir and begin to simmer over medium-low heat. Next, add:
2.5 tsp oregano
2.5 tsp basil
4 tsp salt
5 tsp chili powder
1 tsp black pepper
2/3 cup sliced, drained black olives
4 tsp brown sugar
1 tsp paprika
1 tbsp Worcestershire Sauce
5 tsp white vinegar
a shake or two of red pepper flakes
2 shakes Tobasco
Mix together, bring to a boil, and begin to simmer. Add 1/2 a cup of water or so if necessary, as the chili cooks down. You'll probably want to let it simmer for at least 45 minutes over low heat. Stir frequently, and take care not to burn the chili. Separately, in a pan, brown
1/2 lb chicken or pork, chopped, with
2 tsp olive oil and
1 tbsp dijon mustard.
Once meat is cooked through, add contents of pan to the now-simmering chili. Keep on stirring, and you'll have chili in no time. You might consider adding 2 strips of crispy bacon, half a can of corn, or a couple teaspoons of cumin. I haven't had a chance to experiment with those ingredients just yet. It's your chili, so add or subtract whatever you want. Try it meatless, with tofu and carrots instead, as long as you get 1.5 pounds of something in there. And once the entire pot has been simmering for a good long while, let it stand, cool, and refrigerate overnight. Chili is always better the second day.
A word about flavors: the brown sugar, vinegar, Worcestershire and mustard really flesh out this recipe and help fill every part of your mouth with flavor. If you like things less sweet, add less brown sugar. Tangier? Add a little more vinegar and mustard. And a little extra Worcestershire Sauce for added subtle richness never hurt anyone. Counter an excessively sweet taste with a little vinegar and a little ale.
Tobasco and red pepper flakes put spice right on the top of each bite and attack the tip of your tongue with spicy goodness. Black pepper and chili powder get the heat caught in the back of your throat. If you wanna increase or decrease the level of spice, keep both sides balanced.
Serve piping hot, with grated jack or cheddar cheese if your down with such things. Lemme know what you think, should you ever try it.
