Don't Act Like You Don't Know It. ← 04/01

It's almost Easter-time, girl. Don't act like you don't know it. And you aint called, girl... in like four weeks. I was in the bathroom this morning, shaving my beautiful, chiseled face, thinking about different ways to gel my hair, praying to Jesus. How could you, girl?

I mean, what's the deal? You don't have to say what you did. I already know. I found out from Him. You gave me up for Lent, girl, and that aint cool. But now it's your turn to cry. You should have picked honesty... then you may not have blown it.

Now, I'm chillin' poolside, massaging my pecs, and what's that? A ring ring on my celly. "I really gave up chocolate for Lent," you lie. "I been busy. I miss you. Sucky sucky, wah wah wah." Now you tell me you need me when you call me on the phone? Girl, I found out from Him. You aint called me since Ash Wednesday, 'cuz you gave me up for Lent.

The damage is done, so I guess I'll be leaving. There's a whole line of ladies in this town waiting to get Pantsed, girl. I'll be hookin' it up by Good Friday. Oh and by the way - I've been doing your sister since Columbus Day. She's hot like you, but without the lisp. Don't it make you sad about it? Cry me a river, biatch.

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